In times of old, The Furies protected Mother Right. If a mother (or any woman) was harmed, The Furies swooped down and took their vengeance. They were one of the last vestiges of a world that existed before the patriarchy. When we feel righteous anger, it is The Furies who are calling out to us to make what is wrong right again.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

And Counting... 

I've had my doubts and I've almost quit, but now I'm into Ruby's Imagine. Mario reminded me that I always have these doubts. Except with Mercy, Unbound. He says that was the only one. Even with COTOM, he says, I had a few doubts. He told me I should write all this down so that I'll remember for the next novel, but I didn't. I remembered yesterday that when I was writing Broken Moon, I almost quit because I didn't think I could get her voice down. What did I know about a Pakistani girl? Her voice was so different from Mercy's. Remembering this doubt on my part gave me the confidence to kept going with Ruby. Ruby has a very distinct voice, too, which is very different from my own or anyone else's I know. But I've relaxed at bit and it's gotten easier. We went to Tao of Tea last night. I had dal and rice and wrote on Ruby's Imagine, then I read it to Mario. (Ahhh, the life of Riley.) It was a nice time.

We went for a walk Friday, after I had started Ruby's Imagine. A rust-colored butterfly alighted on my sleeve and stayed for a while, just like in the beginning of the book, and it's proboscis tightened and relaxed, tightened and relaxed, in the form of a spiral: as though telling me a big spin was on the way, like in the book. I figured I couldn't stop writing the book once this had happened: although I was sorely tempted for a couple of days. I don't like writing to be hard. I don't believe one has to suffer for one's art. Or craft. Or life. Or love. I write because I love to, because it makes me feel good, and because I hope others get something out of it. I don't do it to suffer. I don't believe good work needs to be difficult. I'm not saying that it isn't sometimes difficult—but it doesn't have to be. Especially if I'm the one doing the work. Joy, joy, joy. That's my recipe for good work.

But I'm stalling. I'm going to try and write 3,000 words a day, so you may not hear much from me for the next little while. We'll see. My agent has Church of the Old Mermaids, by the way, so the Old Mermaids are making their way through the publishing world. I hope you wish them well. I want their stories out there. I think it's time.

Now here I go to New Orleans and Ruby.

Just imagine it!

May You Create in Beauty! 5 comments

5 Comments:

It's nice to have Mario there to remind you that a period of doubt is part of your labor pains in delivering a novel. But it sounds like there's more joy in your labor than pain, so that's good news!

Good luck to COTOM as it makes its way through the publishing world. May its journey be short and fruitful!

By Blogger kevin, at 1:29 PM  

Many blessings on TOCOM moving quickly through the publishing hoops so she can land in my lap sooner! I am one of the Mermaid sisters off Lummi Island (even though I live on the mainland)and I tend my Mermaid altar(s) seasonally. I am leaving a space of honor for the The Church of the Old Mermaids to reside in once she arrives. I feel that they are a guiding force already through what limited experience we have of them through your blog. They are alive and well and splashing around Lummi Bay, Deception Pass, and Mud Bay. I can barely wait to read the rest of their stories....!

DragonSong Mermaid
(Deb)

By Anonymous Deb, at 3:44 PM  

Kim, you will let us know when TCOOM comes out won't you? I long to read this one as there are so manu kindred spirits in it. BB, Cate

By Blogger kerrdelune, at 5:31 AM  

I really want to bless COTOM--may my temporary dyslexia in the earlier post be resolved. :)

By Anonymous Deb, at 11:35 AM  

Thank you all! I've got all my toes, fingers, and fins crossed. And I knew what you meant, Sister DragonSong Mermaid. :-)

By Blogger Kim Antieau, at 10:35 PM  

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